The anticipated day that all moms to be look forward to with fear, anxiety, nervousness, impatience and happiness.
I don’t know why this day meant so much to me. Just a day. Probably a day that Matty wouldn’t have even been born on. But yet it’s so much more. It’s one of the first things that tied us to Matty and our pregnancy. It made it real. We had a day to countdown too. A day to look forward too. A day that would finally bring us what we’ve been waiting for.
It seemed so far away then. Back in July when we finally got our positive. It seemed far away in December when Matty entered the world. And now it’s here. Just like that.
Matty is now 11 weeks old but adjusted age only ONE day old. Crazy!!
I thought I would be sad today but instead I’m grateful. I get to stare at my handsome son as he gives me his huge, gummy smile and all is right in our little world.
First, thank you all for all your kind comments on my last post, Should Have. The support we get from this community is overwhelming.
Matty is continuing to get stronger. He is almost off of the nasal cannulas which means no oxygen! We can’t wait for that day but still very terrified of it.
The one issue we do seem to be having is feeding. It’s been a slow process and we can only hope it clicks soon. If not, than Matty will be coming on with his feeding tube. Not uncommon for preemies but still not something that I want to happen. Matty has no problem sucking. They just don’t know how strong his swallow reflex is. We’ve been slowly introducing breast feeding. He latches on well (with a nipple shield) and he gets milk out. We don’t know how much he actually swallows though. The good thing is that he doesn’t choke and his vitals stay stable will doing this. I want him to get this down so badly. I don’t want him to stay on the feeding tube. And for a selfish reason also. I’m so tired of pumping!!! Nine weeks of exclusive pumping. I hate it, my boobs hate it and I think it’s making me little crazy.
Other than that not much going on. And in Matty’s world that is a wonderful thing. We don’t think he’s coming home in February though. 😦 Hopefully early March.
In other news, we finally had our cowboy themed baby shower for our Lil’ Buckaroo. We had an awesome time and it was nice to feel normal for a day. Sort of felt like our old selfs but I couldn’t help feel extremely guilty about having fun while Matty was by himself in his hospital crib. It was good to see everyone though. Claudia and I have been secluded from the rest of the world and it’s been months since I’ve seen most of my family. And we got a bunch of gifts. Diapers, Tommee Tippee bottles, swing, high chair, bouncy chair, bath tub, Boppy, baby carrier, bassinet, and a bunch of blankets, clothes and other things. We still need a car seat, stroller, diaper bag, baby monitor and rocking chair though. Still a lot of big, expensive things. We will get them slowly.
Now for some pictures!