Baby steps

Claudia-

We finally have our appointment on Jan 23rd with our doctor to get all the information we need for IVF. Can’t wait! 🙂 I know it’s just for us to ask questions and get answers but at least we’re getting the ball rolling. Baby steps are better than being at a complete stop,right?
Our marriage is as close to perfect as it can be, the only missing piece is our little munchkin or munchkins 🙂 At this point I feel like everyday that goes by that we aren’t TTC is another day wasted but we can’t afford to try IVF right now. Our bank does a no interest finance for IVF for 6 months but I really don’t want to start our journey to motherhood in debt! Once we get a BFP I don’t want to worry about our finances, I want to fully enjoy every second my beautiful wife is pregnant. So, the plan right now is for me to continue working crazy amounts of overtime to get the money together for the IVF and hopefully do the procedure in March. March seems so far away, but I think it’s the perfect month for us to try. My birthday is in march, so maybe we’ll have birthday luck!
We’ll keep updating you all as we go along and hopefully we’ll be hearing good news from those of you TTC. Good luck everyone! 🙂

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Merry Christmas

Cristine:
So my last entry was pretty depressing. As much as this whole ordeal sucks, I don’t want to be see as this depressed person because I do have a great life that I love.

I wasnt too excited about the holidays but I ended up having a good time. First, with my in-laws on Christmas Eve and my family today on Christmas. I am, however, looking forward to the new year. 2011 didn’t bring us what we wanted so please 2012 be good to us!

Merry Christmas to all that read this blog and leave comments. I love reading them and responding and being able to connect with women going through the same obstacles. Hope you enjoy the rest of the year and wishing you all a very, fertile and healthy 2012.

Blah

Cristine:
Trying to find my Christmas spirit but it seems to have disappeared. I fantasied that this Christmas would be when we broke the news to our families that I was pregnant. We had planned on telling them with a cute little card that said “surprise” and a sonogram picture. We obviously let our imagination and hearts run a little wild. I just want to be with my family and wife and hopefully be able to enjoy the holidays. Tis the season!

Seven

Cristine:
In June 2010, I was pregnant for SEVEN wonderful days. It was just the beginning of our TTC journey, only our second insemination. Our happiness quickly turned into heartache. The pregnancy had to be terminated because it was an ectopic pregnancy.

Here we are now a year and a half later and still nothing. Not one step closer to starting our family. People would say to me “well at least you know you can get pregnant” and that used to bring me some comfort. Not anymore. Because I don’t know. It happened once. Well not even. It’s sort of happened once. What if I can’t get pregnant? What if I never experience the feeling of my baby growing inside my tummy? All I know is that I miss that feeling. That feeling I had for seven, amazing days. The feeling of being pregnant and knowing that my wife and I were just about to begin the best part of our lifes.

Now we are getting ready to start IVF and hoping that our last option (for me to get pregnant at least) brings us the baby we yearn for. If not, I guess I can be thankful for those seven days. Be thankful I got to experience that immense feeling of love at least for a short period of time.

Happiest Place on Earth!

Cristine:
Wifey and I are on our way to L.A for 3 lovely days. Last minute trip to get away from everything and enjoy the company of just one another. Only plan we have is Disneyland!! Hopefully the next we visit Mickey and friends we will be a family of three.

Just updating

Cristine:
It’s been awhile since our last post. We are just at a standstill at the moment. My period is now 16 days late, which is very abnormal for me. I have never been THIS late! I called the Dr and I’ve been prescribed some sort of medication and given the instructions to call back once my period does start. This whole process has me a little down. Ive been swallowing and injecting so many different things into my body for months I feel like nothing is working naturally like it should be. Injections to produce more eggs, trigger shot to induce ovulation, and now pills to start my period. I know it will all be worth it in the long run but right now I’m just tired. I feel like one big, emotional mess!

But, we have come to a decision on what our next step is going to be. We are done with injectables and will be moving on to IVF!! We have an appointment on Friday to get some information and hopefully set up a game plan. Really nervous but excited!! Wish us luck.

My Wife

Cristine:

Wanted to take a break from talking about baby stuff because there are other things in my life that are just as worthy to write about. One being my WIFE!!!!

Claudia and I have been together for ten years. Ever since we were Juniors in high school. We have had a few break ups here and there but I guess that’s normal when you get together so young. When people find out we have been together for so long, some ask “do you ever feel like you missed out?” I assume that’s a normal feeling for some couples to feel but I can always answer with 100% truth when I say NO. Claudia is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am so grateful that we found each other and have been able to commit to this relationship. It hasn’t always been easy but we manage to get back up. She has been my steady rock, my shoulder to cry on and my greatest confidant. We have experienced so much together, I would never trade that in for the chance to be single and “see what I’m missing.” I’m missing nothing. I love my life. I love our daily giggle fest. Our spontaneous dance numbers. Our nightly talks in bed about whatever we can think of. Our cuddle time in front of the tv. And the smile I always have on my face because of the beautiful lady I have the privilege of sharing all this with.

“True love is like a diamond; it is rare, beautiful and lasts forever.”
Author Unknown

Wine Night

Cristine:       

I’m not really a big drinker so having to abstain from alcohol during and between cycles has not been a big challenge. However, there is one night that I NEED to drink. Here at our house BFN = wine night. It has sadly become sort of a tradition. For those two weeks, we put all of our energy, hopes, wishes, prayers and dreams into getting that BFP but of course it never happens. By the end of it we are broken and drained. So, after getting over the initial disappointment one of us looks at the other and says, “wine tonight?” And the answer is always YES!! Of course it doesnt solve anything but it sure does make us feel better for the rest of the night. In those few hours we have no worries, no expectations. Just a good nights sleep. The wine bottle marks the end of one long, frustrating cycle and the beginning of another where we go in excited and thinking “this is the one.” I hope this is the last month we have wine night for a very long time, say maybe 9 to 10 months from now. That would be pefect.